Saturday, December 17, 2005

Sh*theads leave, soldiers rejoice


Our continuing odyssey to return to the land of Cheeseburgers and Lap dances has taken another twist. Four of the Majors assigned to the team have returned home early. Now, all four of these ‘leaders’ are pretty much worthless and so their leaving is being celebrated by those of us who have actually…contributed to the…er…whatever it is that we are trying to do.

One of those is the Major who took over my Battalion Team and then fired me. I haven’t heard any good reports about him since, not that that surprises me. He’s leaving early is just one more proof in my eyes that he is…well…worthless.

One of the others is my current ‘boss’, Major E. He hasn’t left the wire since we’ve been here. To call him a coward puts cowards in a bad light. Of course he IS a Transportation Major, so his loss is also being celebrated.

The third Major, Major B…well…hm…how to put this…is a fruitcake. He is in the words of one soldier here a “pain in the ass, know-it-all, chasing his own tail, mutha-f*cka.” He is our Brigade S-3, or Operations Officer. Since we’ve been here he hasn’t done anything productive except have meetings where he ponders why the number don’t add up. There has been no mission planning, Development of the Operations Cell…nothing. There is more than one person here who truly thinks he is a closet Homosexual. Needless to say, his leaving is being celebrated, too.

The forth is Major Sack (not his real name…it is Ball…). The terms worthless and mutha-f*cka just don’t seem to bring the picture into focus. I won’t waste digital ink to talk anymore about him.

The end result of all this is that the rest of the team which remains has to be re-arranged as to cover the positions left vacant.

…I’ve been selected to be the new Brigade S-3.

&%#^@)(@&#%#^&@&*!!!!

All the return to the states planning Major B was supposed to be doing and hasn’t is now my responsibility.

ANYWAY- we are now being scheduled to return shortly after the first of the year. We are still working on the connex issue for shipping our gear home, orders, awards, etc etc etc.

BUT- maybe in 21 to 28 days we should be landing in the US.

Oh…yes…the election went very very well…of course you haven’t heard about it in the US Media.

Gotta go try to find a ride home…

Dutch-out

3 Comments:

At 8:07 AM, Blogger Radiant Byrne said...

You mean you're leaving just when Common Sense takes over??? *laugh* About damn time. At least now, with you making the arrangements, you stand a decent chance of coming home on something that resembles a schedule. Much rejoicing is heard across the nation ...

 
At 9:46 AM, Blogger LiteraryAlchemist said...

Great news, Dutch. Whiskey's lookin' forward to having you home and back on the field. Dutch Day 2006?

Gabe

 
At 9:42 AM, Blogger The Bear said...

you've been selected as the brigade S3?
Looks like you've been FOBbitten.

 

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