Thursday, August 04, 2005

Coming Home

There was a movie with this title a few years ago. It was about a Vietnam Vet returning home and all the problems it caused. I suppose it is cliche, you know. The Vet comes home and things have changed.

It's hard coming home and dealing with being 'away'. I have found my 15 days on R & R difficult and yet on my last night back I really don't want to wake up in the morning and leave.

It is difficult because I have grown used to getting about 6 hours sleep and being up half the night and at dawn. I've gotten used to having my own way with my 'off' time...such as it is. I sleep with my headphones on. I drink my coffee very strong.

Of course my wife has grown used to doing things her way. Different than I do them. Bedtime is one thing we don't conflict too much on- if you know what I mean. However, even food is different for us. It will take time to get back into synch...much longer than 15 days.

The boys are doing well ajusting to me being home. They want me to cook as they have gotten tired of mom's dishes. They've grown so much it is strange to see them when all I've had is pictures to see for the last six months.

The dog...eh...his whole attitude was..."What? You're back?...gimme treat."

I find I can't watch TV. It is horrible. The news makes me so angry I have to leave the room. If all you saw was that crap you'd think we are losing the war. Why can't they get a clear picture on what is really going on over here? All the news focuses on are the attacks- ONLY ONE today in Baghdad...and yet they make it seem like the place is getting worse each day.

I went to the Mall today and it was so strange seeing people just walking around, fat, arms full of bags, like nothing was happening. Maybe that is why we can't seem to stay on target with our national agenda oon the War on Terror. It hasn't really meant anything to most people.

It was hard being home. I kept thinking about my guys in Iraq and hoping they are doing O.K. I feel like I need to be there. It was odd not wearing my uniform, so odd I put it back on one day just so I felt...normal.

The government is cracking down on BLOGS run by military types. I won't be talking much about missions and the like because of security. I mean, when I get back I won't be. I am still home...here...waiting to go back...

The scene in Apocolypce Now when Martin Sheen is talking in the hotel room keeps playing in my mind.

"When I was here all I could think about was being home. When I was home all I could think about was being back in the jungle." ~CPT Willard

almost time for bed. In the morning I leave for the airport.

talk to you when I get back in country.

dutch
out